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花旗国的半边天

An Exploration of Women's Issues

 
 
 

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我和朋友们的婚姻观 (How My Friends and I View Marriage)  

2011-04-09 01:58:52|  分类: 默认分类 |  标签: |举报 |字号 订阅

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我和朋友们的婚姻观 (How My Friends and I View Marriage) - 美国马尾妹 - 花旗国的半边天
 

尽管婚姻是一种最为古老且根深蒂固的社会制度,但女性对它的认识并非一成不变、千篇一律。婚姻过去几乎是女性唯一的终身选择。然而今天,除了结婚之外,她们还拥有很多别的选择。不管结婚与否,女人都可以生活得幸福美满。

Marriage is one of the oldest and most deeply entrenched social institutions, yet women's perceptions about it have been by no means unchanging or uniform. Whereas marriage used to be pretty much the only life option available to women, today there are a variety of options outside of marriage. Women can very easily lead full and happy lives with or without marriage.

Many women my age seem to want to get married one day, but they see it as a very distant and vague prospect, part of a hazy future that they do not yet know much about. My friends and the other women in my classes seem to be more focused on doing well in school and preparing themselves for successful careers than worrying about getting married. As one of my friends said, “It's not necessary for women to get married in the twenty-first century.” They can be financially and emotionally independent with or without marriage. She and my other friends also agreed that if women do decide to get married, they should not have to conform to the traditional gender roles that have characterized marriage in the past. Women should not be solely responsible for raising children or taking care of household chores any more than men should be solely responsible for financially supporting the family. Though these ideas about marriage seem to be generally characteristic of women my age, they are by no means universal. While most women my age don't seem to have thought too extensively about getting married, I do know some women who have been planning their weddings since they were little girls. They already know what kind of dress they will wear, what kind of flowers they will have, and what their ring will look like. Similarly, I know of women who genuinely believe that women should quit their jobs after marrying to look after their children and their households.

I personally do not agree with the idea that women must devote themselves solely to the raising of children and maintenance of the household. These opinions seem to me to be the relic of a bygone era in which marriage formally cemented gender inequality by placing women in positions of subservience to their husbands. However, if some women are content to fulfill traditional marital roles, that is their prerogative. The most important thing is that a modern marriage is founded upon equality and cooperation between a husband and wife, regardless of what roles each partner assumes.


讨论:在现代,中国女孩如何看待婚姻?(Discussion Question: How do young women in China view marriage in modern times?)


Photo: By Anna Maj Michelson from Portland, Estados Unidos (Flickr) [CC-BY-2.0 (www.creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

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